Currently, I am the owner of 3andME and oversee our pretty pink trailer, cute little blue kiosk located inside North Dakota’s Gateway to Science, and our additional wholesale and catering opportunities. We are celebrating five years of business within the Bismarck-Mandan community—we launched just before COVID-19 in August 2019.
What challenges have you faced as a woman in business, and how have you overcome them?
Just as each woman is unique, we each have our own challenges and stories of adversity. For me, becoming an entrepreneur and business owner was the best way to overcome my dysfunctional people-pleasing behaviors. I’ve noticed that women’s boundaries often aren’t respected the same way men’s are. It’s a complex dichotomy—women need to speak up and use their voices, but are then shamed and told to be quiet.
I still remember an encounter shortly after I opened my coffee shop, renting space in a gas station. One of the owners, a man, was talking to me at the counter—just small talk— when he picked up my tip jar, turned it upside down, and dumped all the money and loose change onto the counter and floor. He laughed and walked away. I was a single mom of three small kids, trying my best to build a business and earn an honest paycheck while creating a positive environment and giving back to the community. It’s been more than six years since this happened, but I still think about it often. The worst part is that I didn’t say anything—I was too scared.
A single woman renting space from them—what could I say without fear of retaliation? Sadly, this type of situation happens more often than society admits—women not being taken seriously by men. If I had said something, I suspect the owner would have responded with something like, “It was just a joke. Jeez, lighten up. Why do you have to be that way?”
Establishing firm boundaries, knowing my worth, and not letting others’ actions or words make me doubt myself has been my biggest challenge as a female business owner and leader.
How do you balance business with your personal life, and what advice would you give to women trying to achieve this balance?
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Some view asking for help as a weakness, but it’s actually a strength. Being aware of your limitations helps you avoid taking on too much and remain balanced. Learning to delegate is one of the best skills a leader can acquire. You don’t have to do it all at once.
Did You Know?
Rachael was recently selected as the ND250 coordinator with the North Dakota State Historical Society, representing the state in planning the commemoration of America’s semi-quincentennial in 2026 as part of the federal America 250 program.
What role do you think mentorship plays in the success of women in business, and have you had any mentors who made a significant impact on your career?
Mentorship plays a crucial role in the success of women in business and beyond. Wisdom comes with time and is often acquired through mistakes and lessons learned. Sharing what we’ve learned with others is a powerful way to collectively work toward a better world.
I still stay in touch with my first boss, Lori Miller, from my time at Target; Lynae Hanson, who was my supervisor at the North Dakota Safety Council; and most recently, Beth Demke, from North Dakota’s Gateway to Science, who has become a wonderful mentor to me.
Women were given this beautiful gift of intuition, yet the world has taught us to turn it off, not listen to it. But you should listen to it, you need to! I credit so many of my wonderful business opportunities to my intuition. Please, do not listen to the advice, or more importantly the criticism, of anyone who is not helping you reach your goals. If they are not handing you the bricks you need to build your business, don’t take anything else from them.”
Each of these women possesses qualities and attributes I admire, but what I appreciate most is that they believed in me, even when I didn’t believe in myself. They encouraged and challenged me, helping me realize my talent and potential. A true leader identifies the strengths in others, not as competition or a threat, but as an asset for collaboration and success.
How do you navigate gender biases in your industry, and what advice would you give to women facing similar challenges?
I believe coffee shops and catering businesses are relatively balanced when it comes to gender biases, but it’s interesting how people perceive you. Sometimes, it feels like they don’t believe me when I say I own, create, design, and manage the business. I’m not sure if that’s just my experience or if it’s something women generally face.
My advice? A single match can illuminate a dark room. Fear is a powerful force, and many people are afraid of the unknown. When facing adversity, remember that you are a light capable of eradicating darkness and fear. Change is often daunting, but you can help others overcome their fear by showing them, with love, that change doesn’t have to be scary. This is how we overcome gender biases and stereotypes.
3andME Mobile Coffee Shop
3andmecafe.com
[email protected]
Facebook | /3AndMECafe
Kiosk inside North Dakota’s
Gateway to Science
1600 Canary Ave, Bismarck, ND 58501